Posts from the ‘Strictly Ballgame’ Category

Aug 6

MLB Deadline/Fantasy Points

As I laid out in my April Fantasy Points most big-name player movement takes place on or around the July 31st non-waiver trading deadline. That was the case again this year, as the two biggest fish on the block, Mark Teixeira and Eric Gagne, changed uniforms mere hours before the deadline passed. Braves general manager John Schuerholz decided that two years out of NL East contention was unacceptable, and got aggressive, landing the ex-Rangers slugger. Theo Epstein of the Red Sox, meanwhile, who was skewered for standing pat at the deadline last year just a few weeks before the eventual “Boston Massacre”, also showed some fangs at the deadline, acquiring from Texas the former great-Dodgers closer, Gagne.

The goal of every general manager in April is to be a prospective buyer at the end of July. Being in that position is the most obvious indicator that the team a GM has built is a contender. However, contenders want to improve, which is why they become buyers. GMs who are looking to add talent fall into two categories. The first is for those like Schuerholz, who have assessed the landscape of their division and league, in addition to the weaknesses of their own team, and determine that one big piece can be the difference between a second place finish and a spot in the postseason. Suffice to say Schuerholz believes Teixeira will solidify the middle of the Braves lineup and give his offense the kick it needs to run with the the likes of the Mets and Phillies down the stretch. The second category is reserved for GMs of the top couple of teams in baseball, who conclude that one major addition can put their already-playoff bound teams over the top. Epstein’s rationale was that with a deep lineup and consistent rotation, sticking a guy like Gagne in between Hideki Okajima and Jonathan Papelbon would officially vault the Red Sox into “team to beat” status.

For each Schuerholz and Epstein at the end of July, there are a few GM-counterparts that find themselves either unwilling to part with prospects or unable to present a viable package to suitors, and are forced to begin the month of August with a bit of an empty feeling, reflecting and vexing about missed opportunities. Brian Cashman of the Yankees and David Dombrowski of the Tigers have assumed those roles this summer, as Cashman wanted to get a deal done for Teixeira and Dombrowski made it no secret that he coveted Gagne, given the injuries to Joel Zumaya and Fernando Rodney. Of the Tigers and Yankees, probably only one will make the playoffs this year, which means come October one of the those GMs will have to be answering some tough questions about his lack of deadline-activity (and if it’s Cashman, will probably have to be finding a new day job).

In case you opted not to take a look my original fantasy points, the gist of my argument was that like real GMs, we fantasy owners should look to emulate the modus operandi of the guys getting paid the big bucks to wheel and deal. Which is to say making a blockbuster trade early in the season is careless, because you have no bead on the vibe of your league or even your own team. By now, however, you do have that clarifying knowledge. You know the top teams in your league, and have analyzed the depth and caliber of their rosters; you see what kind of fluctuation has occurred in the standings, which is a good indicator of the prevalence of parity within a given league. And you’ve had ample time to see what your own squad has to offer. So now, with most fantasy trade-deadlines on the horizon, it’s time to start critically evaluating the big picture for your team.

Ideally you find yourself in either Schuerholz’s or Epstein’s shoes (which is a nicer way of saying hopefully your squad doesn’t stink). At this juncture a fantasy owner’s strategy is two-tiered, depending on if the league is rotisserie or head to head. If you’re part of a rotisserie league with no playoffs and only a league champion at the end, your work is waiting for you within the individual league standings. If your team has been middle to top-third of the pack throughout, chances are there is a marked imbalance between the statistical output of your offense in relation to your pitching staff. Injuries and off-years are the prime culprits for such an imbalance. Any fantasy GM of a mediocre team should be hoping for this, because it means you have a surplus of marketable commodities on one side and an underachieving/overly injured contingent on the other. If not, then you just have a very mediocre team.

I reiterate; if your team has been languishing in the middle of the standings you are in much better position if you have either a dominant offense or pitching staff as opposed to decent versions of both. Why? Because now you can afford to package one of your best players and be in line to get in return two very good players to supplant your weakness. For example, if your staff has been exemplary, say with the likes of C.C. Sabathia, Roy Oswalt and Dan Haren as your top three, while your offense has been woefully unproductive you can afford to trade one or even two of those big guns for some big-time offense back (guys like Carlos Lee or Ichiro or Ryan Howard). Since only about thirty percent of the season remains, the categories that you’ve been at the top of the league in shouldn’t fluctuate too much, because of the hundred games over which you’ve had that production. On the flip side you’re now positioning yourself to make a run at the categories that have held you’re team back, and if you can find a way to acquire any of those handful of late-season performers, well then, you just might be in position to make a league-leader start sweating.

As for fantasy owners who are in head to head leagues, the strategy is far more authentic. As opposed to rotisserie leagues, where the sole objective is to finish in first place, for head to head you want to finish in the top four to six of your league and gain a playoff spot. Playoff position doesn’t matter so much as building a team that is capable of winning three consecutive head to head showdowns in September. Divisional races can greatly alter strategy; that is if a team is running away with its division in September (like the Mets and Yankees last year), managers will look to rest their players over the insignificant stretch run to gear up for October. This is the double edged sword that characterizes head to head leagues; the fact that a championship-caliber fantasy team can be derailed because its players are on real teams that are contending for a World Series and care far less about September than fantasy junkies.

The good news is that it doesn’t appear there will be any team shutting it down early this season, as all divisional races are tight (no more than four games), with the exception of the AL East (Sox up seven), which will likely become closer as the season winds down. In other words this is a good year to be in a head to head league. So how does a fantasy owner’s strategy differ? First and foremost what’s happened to this point doesn’t mean a whole lot. If your team is in playoff position you have to be projecting towards September. Check out the September track records of your players and relevant competition. Who’s likely to heat up? Who’s likely to cool off? Who’s shown a tendency of going down with an injury late in the season? When making a significant deal at this stage of a head to head league, the fantasy owner who can most thoroughly answers those three questions should get the better of the deal nine times out of ten.

For the record, I’m participating in one head to head league and one rotisserie league. I’m currently in second and sixth place respectively. So naysayers, my claims are not unfounded…

Now go deal!!!!! And enjoy all those pennant races in cyberspace.

(Prepare for a few in reality as well.)

Jul 31

9 Comments

KG/Celtics Points

Kevin Garnett is a Boston Celtic. Let that sink in for a moment. Weird, isn’t it? For the first time in almost two decades we devoted Celtic-faithful have been given the opportunity to ponder the unthinkable questions. Questions like how many times will the Green be appearing on national television? Or how many teams in the NBA will finish with more wins than the C’s? And the kicker of all kickers: are the Celtics about to be flirting with championship #17?

Early answers are: many, my friends; very few, folks; and in the words of Borat: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!

In an effort to assess the scope of this situation, I’ll be blunt. The Celtics are better off today than they would’ve been had they gotten the number one pick in the NBA Draft. Whoa, you might be inclined to interject. You’re saying KG and Ray Allen are better for the franchise long term than Greg Oden would be? Actually no, I’m not saying that. But in case you missed my Paul Pierce Points and don’t know how much he has meant to the city of Boston over the years, I’ll be glad to expand.

I have little doubt that Oden will ultimately become the center piece of a championship team, maybe even a dynasty. For the foreseeable future, though, the kid’s still a kid (even if he looks like he could be the patriarch of multiple Oden-generations). He played one entrepreneurial year in college, and much of that one season he had the use of only his off-hand. He may be a gargantuan man among gigantic men, but rest assured, he will take his lumps for the next few years. The Shaqs and Duncans and Dwight Howards of the world simply wouldn’t have it any other way. He has a whole lot of maturing to do, even if his size and facial hair wouldn’t indicate such. Unfortunately for Paul Pierce (and hence the Celtics), time is of the essence. Paul is beyond hungry for postseason glory. He’s starving, he’s famished. Hell, he’s basically been fasting for the last five years!!

So the answer was obvious. Bring on board the two guys in the league who are arguably as hungry as Paul and at similar points in their careers, and run with it for the next three to five. The time is now. For once, that mantra employed by the Celtics’ Beantown counterparts, the Red Sox and Patriots, has been reciprocated by the Green.

Realistically, the only possible hindrance I see that could thwart this team from winning right from the word go is chemistry. As is always the case when stars get thrown together, egos will have to learn to coexist. I’m confident these three will. They have too much in common not to. All three have brought teams and cities to places they never envisioned: Paul took the Celtics to the ’02 Eastern Conference Finals; Ray carried the ’01 Bucks and the ’05 Sonics deep into the playoffs. And KG helped the ’04 Wolves win the first two playoff series in their franchise history. All have been borderline excessively-loyal guys. Other players in Paul’s or KG’s shoes would’ve skipped town years ago, given their stature and frustrating situations. As for Ray, he was as fiercely loyal to Milwaukee as anyone could be to a small-market city with no viable title shot; he didn’t depart until the powers-that-be effectively replaced him with Michael Redd.

So they’re all ecstatic to be teammates and have already been buddies for some time now, which in my opinion are the building blocks of good chemistry. And don’t underestimate the impact of Boston on their chemistry. From what I’ve heard and read, this deal wouldn’t have had a chance of happening without unrelenting lobbying on Paul’s behalf to KG. For the last few weeks he’s been in close contact with Garnett, surely playing up the value of Boston. Since the city has frequently been labeled as “that place” black athletes don’t want any part of, my bet is Paul brought KG up to speed about that misnomer. History (ie the reason why Boston has a justifiable-bad rap) aside, one thing about the city I’m sure Paul has conveyed is its unmatched passion for its teams as well as its undying love and support of its athletes.

You play pro sports in Boston, you’re automatically on a higher plateau than your colleagues in other cities. Granted, fans in Boston are needy and the media commands accountability, which combined make it difficult to be an athlete without being a celebrity. But even borderline-shy, reclusive players like Manny Ramirez feel the pull of the city to such a degree that in the end the pressure and demand is worth the reward. No city and fan base will support and defend you as staunchly as Boston. No place will drip with such visceral emotion after an otherworldly performance. And if in the end you have a hand in bringing a title to the town, every step you take from that point forward will be on hallowed ground. Paul feels it. He’s felt it through the adoration he’s received, through the devotion of the faithful. He’s felt it through Manny and Pedro and Corey Dillon and Troy Brown. And you know what else? He found a way to make KG feel it.

When you think about it, Garnett has always been destined to play in Boston. Here is a guy who literally leaves it all out on the court on a nightly basis, hell or high water. Now he’s going to be playing in a house that won’t be wondering if he’ll blow the roof off; no, they’ll be expecting it every night. And that first evening when he’s formally introduced and the entire waterfront shakes, like all athletes in new places, he’ll want to savor that moment and freeze it in time, because he’ll have to believe it will be next to impossible to rival it. So it goes for athletes previously foreign to Boston. Just wait until the first shot he hits. The first big swat he records. His first 20-20 game. His first deft dish to Paul for an overtime dagger. Just wait, KG, just wait.

It was this notion that Paul undoubtedly succeeded in relaying to KG, along with the fact that he, KG and Ray will be manhandling the East for the next few years to the tune of 55+ wins and an annual top seed in the playoffs. Once again I won’t mince words: I believe the Celtics are poised to make multiple Finals appearances over the next couple of years. I can’t go so far as to put them on that next level with the two best teams in the league, the Suns and Spurs (only because either Steve Nash or Tony Parker would manhandle Rajon Rondo en route to a Finals MVP), but I entirely believe the Celtics are now the team to beat in the East.

So am I calling number 17 just yet? No, I’m not ready to make any crazy proclamations, but I am ready to watch these guys play ball. And I will say this: when you unite a trio of seasoned and starving superstars and they get a few shots at the glory fruit, expect them to find a way to get fed.

Jul 24

10 Comments

NBA Betting Scandal

With all due disrespect to Barry Bonds and Michael Vick, what’s transpired with NBA referee Tim Donaghy over the last week is, for lack of a better term, in a whole different league. Bud Selig and Roger Goodell actually have grounds for a toast, albeit one wrought with sick irony. While each of their respective enterprises, MLB and the NFL, is seeing a major scandal come to a head, their governing-counterpart in the NBA, David Stern, is smack in the middle of a s–t storm the likes of which has never been felt in professional sports.

I never thought I would defend Bonds, a blatant cheater who is going to break one of baseball’s timeless records because of performance enhancing drugs. I also couldn’t fathom trying to give perspective to Vick’s perpetuation of a cruel and sadistic hobby for profit. But now, amid allegations that Donaghy has been fixing NBA games in an elaborate criminal endeavor, in accord with members of the mob and possibly his own colleagues, I must say that Bonds and Vick are now small potatoes. For Vick, his alleged involvement in a dog-fighting ring is abhorrent, but nonetheless is mutually exclusive to his day job as an employee of the NFL. In Bonds’ case, the entire home run/steroid era of the last decade is going down in history with a collective asterisk; he’s just going to be the poster-boy because of the amount of dubious home runs he’s hit. However, right next to him will be his partners in crime, guys like Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire and Gary Sheffield (and many more).

The word “integrity” gets thrown around a lot when it comes to athletes and improprieties. Bonds and everyone else who’s ever juiced have exhibited very little personal integrity, which in turn has cast a shadow over the game of baseball. Likewise for Vick, and his alleged operation of animal cruelty. There are two glaring differences between them and Donaghy though. First, their actions never sought to undermine the games themselves in the name of illicit financial gain. Second, they are athletes, not officials. There have been two major precedents for players using their sports to profit monetarily, both in baseball. In 1919 the Chicago White Sox (aka the “Black Sox”) threw the World Series because they were underpaid and treated poorly by their owner, Charles Comiskey. The term “Black Sox” was in fact spawned because Comiskey was too cheap to pay for his team’s dry-cleaning, resulting in black, sordid uniforms (although history would ultimately validate the nickname). The second instance involved Pete Rose, who as we all know wagered on tons of baseball, which included his own team, the Cincinnati Reds. However, he never bet against his own team, and he was still one player on a field of nine.

What Donaghy has supposedly been doing, fixing games, is not simply on another level of the severity scale, it’s on the highest level. Why? Because he’s a referee; it’s his sole purpose to moderate games in the most unbiased of fashions. In addition, basketball is the easiest game to fix. Unlike in other major professional sports, officials in basketball actually hold sway over how many points are scored. Of course the play of the athletes is obviously supposed to dictate the amount of foul calls and not vice versa, but that’s exactly the catch. With over/unders (ie a set gambling line for two teams’ aggregate points scored) representing a huge chunk of wagers, an NBA official could very conceivably alter the final score and/or outcome of a game by calling or not calling inordinate numbers of fouls. If you watch this YouTube compilation of Donaghy and his crew calling Game 3 of this year’s Suns-Spurs series, you’ll see what I mean.

Seeing Donaghy make the latest call in NBA history for Manu Ginobili was enough to draw skepticism from both the ABC crew announcing the game as well as scores of reporters and journalists. Upon watching that entire reel from Game 3 (as well as the whole Suns-Spurs series) it is more than possible for one to come up with a variety of conspiracy theories of apparent crookedness with legitimate hard evidence to support a claim. I don’t want to speculate but I will expand on the implications of this scandal. I see a possible two-fold disaster pending for the league.

The first issue at hand is its awareness of the FBI investigation into Donaghy, which has been ongoing for nearly a year. There have been conflicting reports as to Stern’s knowledge about the federal probe, with the New York Times reporting most recently that he was not brought up to speed until after the Finals (although the New York Daily News reported that Donaghy’s neighbors in Pennsylvania were under the impression that a private investigator who was looking into Donaghy’s gambling proclivities a year ago was acting on behalf of the league). In short, if it surfaces that Stern had knowledge of any aspect of any investigation into Donaghy or Donaghy’s activities themselves and allowed him to continue calling games, this thing will snowball in the face of the commish.

Next is Donaghy himself. He will undoubtedly name names in either an effort to take heat off of himself or expose what could well be a greater referee-conspiracy. This is no doubt Stern’s worst nightmare. Whatever comes out of Donaghy’s mouth will double as a serious blow to the credibility and integrity of Stern and his league. In a statement made Tuesday Stern reinforced his belief that Donaghy was acting alone.

“We think we have a rogue, isolated criminal here,” said Stern.

Within this context Stern might as well have subbed the word “hope” for “think”, because at this point in the investigation that’s all he can really do. Once Donaghy turns himself in this week and the Feds tape recorders start rolling, this scandal could take yet another decisive turn for the ugly.

As ESPN.com’s Sportsguy aptly pointed out, this scandal is a story straight out of a Hollywood script. I agree with his vision of this imminent film, right until the ending. If this story truly followed a movie script everything would happen as Sportsguy laid out until the point where the ref (Matt Damon) is indicted and placed in protective custody while awaiting trial. At this juncture either the mob boss (Alec Baldwin) or the embattled commish (an always-shady Ron Silver) would give the word to “dispose” of the ref before the trial to avoid further damage down the line. The film would end with Damon getting approached by a few gun-toting thugs with silencers, and that would be that. A viewer would be left with the token question: was it the mob boss protecting his future interests or the corrupt-commish resorting to all and any measures to preserve his league? Both would have legitimate reasons to rid themselves of Damon and viewers could decide for themselves.

Hollywood and fiction aside, this scandal has opened a door into a dark and murky world usually left to be portrayed by art. But don’t be fooled: both the stakes and players in this devious and highly illegal scam are real, and it’s going to get a lot uglier before there is any resolution. Let’s just hope art sticks to imitating life and not the other way around.

Jul 5

5 Comments

Paul Pierce/Celtics Points

Back in the day the Boston Globe had a contest to determine the eventual nickname of Paul Pierce, “The Truth”. My submission was “Pauly Prime Time”, because he was easily the most clutch player I’d ever seen don the legendary green and white. Sure, I watched Larry Bird at the end of his career but I (along with my entire generation) was too young to really appreciate the great Bird/McHale/Parish teams. For us Celtic pride was a concept passed down through anecdotes and mementos. We were told stories of triumph about the Celtics of the 80s, but after the ’86 title (the Green’s last to date) those stories turned tragic. The sudden deaths of Len Bias in ’86 (cocaine overdose) and Reggie Lewis in ’93 (heart failure) assured the Celtics of their first prolonged fling with futility in the history of the franchise. For the older generations this was a hard pill to swallow. 16 championships in 30 years gave way to multiple seasons in the mid 90s that saw the Celtics trot out the likes of Dino Radja and Dana Barros as “franchise players”.

From total greatness to total insignificance went the Celtics in less than a decade. I grew up during this period of insignificance; watched the Celtics during the week on local television and waited for the NBA on NBC to show me some real basketball on Sundays. I then watched a crazy-eyed college coach take over the team, infuse it with players from his former school, and drive it even further into the ground. When he finally exited his legacy was left in a sound bite. Thing was, we already knew that Bird, Parish and McHale weren’t going to be making miracle comebacks in the late 90s; we just happened to have a coach who was pompous enough to employ that mode of justification for his team’s failure. Maybe if in his inaugural press conference Rick Pitino had opted to tell us who was going to be “walking through that door” (namely Antoine Walker, Ron Mercer and the rest of the freakin Kentucky Wildcats) we would’ve been better prepared for what was to come.

Either way it wasn’t until we drafted a sleek shooter out of Kansas in ’98 that I even started to comprehend what it meant to have a guy who could fill up a box score, put a team on his back and inspire the masses. In Paul we found that guy. All he had was Antoine, but the two meshed well together, enjoyed the city they played in and brought some relevance back to an ever-fading tradition. Then some pieces of s–t tried to take that away from us in 2001, tried to murder our first star in more than ten years. Not only did they fail, not only did Paul survive 11 stab wounds but he returned to lead the Celtics to 49 wins and their first birth in the playoffs since Larry Legend. They won nine games that postseason, all thanks to Paul. His surreal decisive-Game 5 (46 points) in the first round against Allen Iverson and the 76ers was one-upped only by his pantheon performance in the Fleet Center’s first Eastern Conference Finals game against New Jersey. In that contest the Celtics entered the fourth quarter trailing by 21 points. Paul responded by playing the most jaw-dropping 12 minutes of basketball I’ve ever seen, slashing into that deficit with 19 points of his own to win the game and snag a slice of history. That one playoff run, with those two games intertwined, was good enough to place Paul at the top of lists in Celtics-record books co-populated by some of the greatest and most prolific champions in the history of the game.

2002 was the year I became a true Celtics fan; the year when history and lore met reality head on. We had a guy who if complemented by the right player, could and most definitely would lead us to that elusive 17th championship. Of course being a realist and having a decent grasp on the state of the game I knew there was obviously no chance Shaq would bolt LA for Beantown, same for Duncan and Garnett from their respective cities. But I knew something would happen, someone would be brought in so at the very least we’d be given the chance to continue to be exhilarated by this young superstar. It took him only a handful of games in the ’02 playoffs to make a decisive case for his meriting a co-star, a fixture with which to coexist for years to come. Five years and five great “Pauly Prime” seasons later, I found myself still waiting. I found myself defiling sports “fandom” by rooting for my team to lose, if only to have a better chance at winning some bogus lottery. Then when all went wrong I found myself feeling..not distraught, not demoralized or crappy, just feeling. I was feeling for Paul. It all came in a wave, the realization of how unfair it all was. This guy, who had given and endured so much to stay true to the city and tradition that took him in, was now inexplicably himself feeling the dusk of his career start to settle in just over the horizon.

It was then that I decided this: to hell with “the future”; screw “down the road”. Even if philosophically it contradicts everything Danny Ainge has done since arriving in Boston I still don’t care. It’s already a shame that Paul has played nine seasons in Boston and has had a total of one contending team around him. It would go down as an utter travesty if that number stayed the same throughout seasons 10 through 13 of Paul’s career. So that’s why I endorsed wholesaling our youth for Kevin Garnett, because each year of KG/Paul would represent 50 wins and who knows what else. And that’s why I’m on the Ray Allen for Delonte West, Wally Szczerbiak and the 5th-bandwagon. From what I’ve heard and read the city of Boston is pretty much split down the middle on this one, but the bulk of the negativity is driven by the sports radio juggernauts who hold way too much sway over popular opinion in the town. Many of them are very high on the player the Celtics drafted and gave to Seattle, Jeff Green (from Georgetown).

Allow me to assert that I had been lobbying for Jeff Green since we got hosed by the lottery while the likes of Corey Brewer and the Chinese guy were dominating the discussion. I’ve been a huge Big East fan and I’ve watched this kid for three years be constricted by the conservative brand of ball John Thompson III has brought back to the Hoyas’ system. Make no mistake; Jeff Green will be a dynamic and explosive player in this league but he never really had a chance to come out of his shell at Georgetown, and will need more maturation time than a guy like Brewer. So we deal him and two decent players for a soon-to-be 32 year old shooting guard with two reconstructed ankles. There’s your reason in a nutshell for the skepticism that exists.

Here’s the flip side to that coin: seven-time All Star; career 21.5 scoring average; career three point percentage of .397 (that last stat is best interpreted when juxtaposed with Antoine’s career .325). He’s a product of the Northeast as he spent three years at UConn and has maintained his roots (he’s already declared himself a Red Sox fan). Ray, like Paul, is coming off a stretch in his career where he wasn’t given a whole lot to work with in the jungle that is the West. Like Paul he never complained, always played with a smile on his face and continued being the long range assassin that he’s been since he took to the hardwood. And like Paul, he plays with a distinct passion and rises to the occasion when the occasion warrants it (translation: when the game’s on the line he wants that rock). All and all he’s the guy Paul deserves to have as his wingman and yes, while it would’ve been nice if this had happened five years ago, I have news for you: it didn’t. Nothing has happened in the past five years and no one knows that better than Paul. Furthermore, unlike colleagues of similar stature he’s never used his spotlight to shake down front offices and toss around ultimatums, and when he’s called for change he’s done so respectfully. Granted, at times he’s been angry, but he’s only human, not to mention a fierce competitor who tasted a morsel of postseason glory as an up and comer.

In this post-Jordan era where eight out of nine champions have had Shaq or Duncan, the idea of “building a championship team” is farcical. And in this day and age where one big acquisition can jettison a team from the bottom to the top of the sorry-East, and you just happen to be a reeling franchise with a superstar who’s been begging for a wingman, is it really a question? With a nucleus of Paul, Ray and one of the few emerging big men in the conference, Al Jefferson, the Atlantic division and a top-four seed is ripe for the taking. Does that mean number 17 is imminent? I would say not. But there’s got to be some middle ground between “rebuilding” and “championship caliber”, right? If not then someone should send the memo to ummmm EVERY TEAM IN THE EAST!!!

As I said before, to my generation the Celtics as they were previously known were nothing more than a myth with historical documentation. Paul pulled the franchise out of the sediment upon his arrival in ’98 and restored some relevance in ’02. He only had one opportunity to chase a championship and came up six games short. However the finest work of his basketball life has been done in the NBA Playoffs, on the legendary-parquet floor of the Boston Celtics, with 16 world championship banners hanging over his head. It may be a while before the Celtics capture that seventeenth but Paul’s time here is finite. And you know something? There’s a lot I would give to see Paul have the chance to win another nine playoff games. Wally and Jeff Green? Done and done.

Apr 29

Multi-Points

So much is happening in the world of sports that I’d have to write five pieces to adequately address everything that’s gone down in the past week. But that would take a long time and I don’t get paid for this (yet).

A quick recap. First the Red Sox swept the Yankees at Fenway. Then the Bulls scorched the Heat in four, making Miami the weakest defending champion in decades. Next the Sox proceeded to take two of three at Yankee Stadium. Then the Patriots traded a signed-Tom Brady jersey to Al Davis for Randy Moss (actually it was a fourth round pick). Finally the week concluded with the Golden State Warriors winning Game 4 against Dallas, to go up 3-1 against the defending-Western Conference champions.

What does all that mean? Well most relevantly it means my NBA Playoff Preview Part Deux has officially been “deaded” quicker than Turtle’s record deal with Saigon on “Entourage”. It also means I now have the chance to throw my two cents on all of it…

Yankees The Yankees have suffered through slow starts before (they were 9-13 two years ago) but what strikes me about this April is that without A-Rod the Bombers wouldn’t have won more than five games. Because with him they still only won nine!! That’s embarrassing. Just how embarrassing is anyone’s guess. But if you want to find out for yourself, and you happen to have the pleasure of being chummy with a New York fan, ask them what’s worse: watching A-Rod’s most prolific-April in history result in a record of 9-14 or living through a 5-18 start, which evidently would have been the case minus A-Rod’s superhuman effort early on. I say the latter’s less humiliating, because the Yanks starting staff is ravaged and Mariano Rivera always struggles out of the gate, so Yankee fans would at least have a viable (albeit weak) excuse for such a sputtering start. But with A-Rod hitting more home runs than some divisions over the first half of the month, to win nine out of twenty three games is just poor.

Red Sox I can count on one hand the number of players in the game today who are capable of carrying their teams for a stretch of time all by their lonesome: Albert Pujols, Barry Bonds, Alex Rodriguez, David Ortiz, and Manny Ramirez (honorable mention: Vlad Guerrero, Ryan Howard, Carlos Beltran). Here’s my point: look at what A-Rod has done in comparison to what Manny has done until this juncture. Now extrapolate that s**t. Yankee fans love noting how “it’s only April”. Well for Manny April represents the calm before the storm. While A-Rod’s .355-14-34-1.297 has been the respirator on which the whole Yankees-organization is breathing, Manny’s .202-3-13-.629 has been nothing short of a comical farce. Why? Because the Red Sox have taken five of six from New York and have the best record in baseball. Manny, meanwhile, has contributed little more than a few bombs and a couple goofy exchanges with Dice-K. We all know that as the weather warms up so too does Manuel Ramirez. (Makes that 6.5 game lead seem a little more imposing, doesn’t it?)

Randy Moss Let’s make something clear right away: the Patriots don’t need Randy Moss. In the months subsequent to their collapse in the AFC Championship they signed the deep threat (Dante Stallworth) they so desperately needed, a big and physical possession receiver (Kelley Washington), and a slot-specialist (Wes Welker). Those acquisitions supplemented a receiving core that proved to be nearly sufficient enough to return to the Super Bowl. So when the opportunity arose to pull Moss out of Oakland for nothing more than a fourth round draft pick, Bill Belichick and Scott Pioli probably said, why not? Then they met with Moss, and most assuredly laid down the law cut and dry. Something along the lines of if you come here and work like every other guy on this team, you’re going to win a Super Bowl. Anything less and you’ll be out on your rear end quicker than you could ever imagine. The knock on Randy Moss has always been his incessant and inherent selfishness. Now he has the opportunity to tie his personal legacy into that of the most successful franchise of this era. Here’s one vote saying Randy chooses the Patriot-way over the highway.

Mavs-Warriors Forget the 67 wins in the regular season. Twenty percent of the Mavs’ 15 losses came against the Warriors. (That’s three.) And frankly they look exactly like the team that last June stood by, in shock and awe, as the Heat took four straight from them in the Finals. Which is to say they’re playing scared. And timid. Playing the Warriors period was already the worst-case scenario for Dallas. It’s rapidly becoming a worst-case nightmare. Including playoffs, Golden State has now taken a whopping nine of the last 11 from Dallas. The Warriors’ coach, Don Nelson, knows all of Dirk Nowitzki’s secrets. And their fans are genuinely intimidating. So how exactly are the Mavs going to pull off three straight and avoid becoming the biggest fraud in NBA history? Don’t ask me. Optimists will point to last year as the Suns climbed out of a 3-1 hole to down the Lakers. The parallels end there. The weight on the shoulders of the Mavs is immense. Between their implosion in the Finals last year to dominating the entire league but Golden State this season, the Mavs are going to have to overcome history and reality. (Plus Stephen “Haymaker” Jackson.)

Finally, a few notes on imminent Eastern Conference second round matchups…

Nets-Cavs This Nets team is pretty much on par with the New Jersey teams that went to back to back NBA Finals a few years ago. Difference is the rest of the Eastern Conference was god-awful back then. No more will Jason Kidd win multiple playoff series’ by leading the fastbreak and tossing alleys to Richard Jefferson. The Nets reign as the most hard-nosed defensive team in the East has long passed. Simply put, anything the Nets can do Lebron can do better. Shoot. Pass. Defend. All advantage Lebron. He’ll ultimatley need a true wingman to take the next step, that much is known. But for the moment Lebron won’t have too many problems disposing of a team that recently has taken nothing but steps back.

Bulls-Pistons The Pistons exhausted their nitrous way too prematurely last year. For a team that already understood the grind of winning an NBA title, Detroit burned itself out in the 2005-06 regular season (64-18), had to dig itself out of a 3-2 hole just to defeat King James in the second round of the playoffs, then bowed to the Heat in the East Finals. I know what you’re thinking. To say the Bulls are hot after watching what they did to the defending champs would be like saying an ice-bath is cool. And yes, Ben Wallace did get the better of his old team during the regular season, but don’t let that fool you. Chicago is still maturing, and this season Detroit has adapted its mentality to that of a team expecting to win a championship.

Apr 16

7 Comments

MLB Fantasy Points

MLB General Managers look at the season in three two-month increments. They spend April and May evaluating what they’ve put together and discovering if their team can be a contender. June and July are periods of assessment; GM’s of losing teams assess what kind of prospects they could receive upon dealing a big-name player while GM’s of winning teams try to target that missing piece that will hopefully put their club over the top. For this reason the majority of trades happen in July because at that point a GM knows for sure whether he’s going to be a buyer or seller. After the July 31st non-waiver trade deadline, teams are either in it to win it or to play spoiler. (Although since the inception of the wild card many more teams have at least a theoretical shot at the playoffs much deeper into the season.) In sum, it is very rare to see a major trade consummated in the springtime unless it is in response to a key player sustaining a major injury.

So what, you might say, not tellin me anything I don’t already know. Fair enough. Here’s my question: why do so many fantasy owners see fit to wheel and deal so early in the season? The purpose of a fantasy league is to be your own GM, right? Don’t you put together a team that you believe will compete for the long haul? Why not emulate the guys getting paid tons of money to run baseball franchises? They allegedly know what they’re doing, and assuredly know more than we do, so it’s worth using their template.

Of course the biggest difference between GM’s and fantasy GM’s is that the real ones are constructing teams that can win baseball games whereas their fantasy counterparts are trying to amass the best cumulative statistics. Wins versus stats: an age-old paradigm that frequently pits the selfless against the selfish. Here’s the problem, though. Having a “good clubhouse guy” on your fantasy squad means squat. All fantasy owners are inherently (and justifiably) interested in only one thing: statistics.

Baseball is a sport told by numbers. By virtue of the length of season and intricacies of the game, not to mention the myriad of ways to statistically interpret production, baseball relies more on stats than any other sport. However, as complex as the game is, it is also quite simplistic. One guy throws, one guy hits, again and again. Because of this, it’s a game that revolves heavily around the law of averages. The element of repetition is prevalent, and most relevant to my argument. For example, if you flip a coin ten times, it could quite realistically land heads seven of those times. That would give you a 70% rate of heads. Flip that coin five hundred more times and I guarantee the rate of heads will be right around 50%. That may not be enlightening, but it is the law of averages.

Let’s relate that to baseball. Take a look at the current stats of three players, who for the moment shall remain anonymous.

Player A- .234, 0 HR, 1 RBI
Player B- .200, 0 HR, 6 RBI
Player C- .212, 1 HR, 5 RBI

Now, look at the stats of these three players.

Player D- .370, 2 HR, 11 RBI
Player E- .343, 6 HR, 10 RBI
Player F- .412, 2 HR, 8 RBI

Obviously anyone with rudimentary knowledge of baseball could look at these stats and say with complete certainty that Players A, B, and C are all worth trading for Players D, E, and F. In fact, the numbers would indicate that any fantasy owner who didn’t come to that conclusion must be a little thick in the head. Or just a real baseball junkie who knows that Player A is actually Alfonso Soriano, Player B Manny Ramirez, and Player C Travis Hafner. Three of the premier sluggers in the game today, whose numbers currently pale in comparison to the likes of Player D (Aaron Hill), Player E (Ian Kinsler), and Player F (Orlando Hudson).

Hey, no knock to Hill, Kinsler, and the O-Dog (who is finally living up to his ridiculously cool nickname). These guys have all had explosive first two weeks, and just might continue their bashing through the summer. However history would tell me that Soriano, Manny, and Hafner will all be fine. The law of averages has my back here too. For the purposes of this context the ole law states quite simply, that Hill, Kinsler, and Hudson will inevitably slow down and those other three will most definitely turn it on, and soon. (You know, water seeks its level…or something like that.)

Back to the main point. If you consider yourself a knowledgeable baseball fan and participated in your league’s draft (and did so with no identifiable mental black outs), there is simply no reason to make a big trade this early in the season. Chances are you have one of those three struggling, blue-chip superstars on your team. (If not one of them then someone in the class of Gary Sheffield, Mark Teixeira, or Lance Berkman, all of whom are presently enduring prolonged troubles at the plate.) So basically one of your top picks is not only performing poorly, but is actually skewing the entire statistical breakdown of your squad. A detriment at the moment? Absolutely. In the long run? Not in the least bit.

Real-life GM’s give their teams two months on average to develop an identity before making possible personnel decisions. And believe me, their concerns are far more serious than pondering what Manny and Hafner’s final 2007 stat-line will look like. So why shouldn’t we use the same philosophy? As fantasy owners, we all have our core of carefully selected blue-chippers to complement a handful of very good players and a couple of handpicked sleepers. That’s a fantasy baseball team. In my opinion it’s a crime to start tinkering with that entity so early in the season, when some of your stars are actually hindering the output of your team. I for one can say Manny probably won’t get the flip a coin ten times, flip it five hundred times thing, but that sure as hell won’t stop the law of averages from applying to the big fella.

So here’s my advice: take a hard look at your squad. If today, you feel it’s not as good as it was two weeks ago, and you haven’t sustained any major injuries, making a blockbuster trade isn’t the right move. Trying to get a refund on that twin you dropped probably is.

Mar 26

3 Comments

CSTV Inside Points (plus picks)

I thought this would be a good time to deviate from the norm. I’ll still take a look at this weekend’s Final Four (one of the best in recent memory), as well as offer my picks (for what their worth) for these truly pick em games. But let’s face it, I’m not going to offer much in the way of original and informed insight. Not with all the media, insiders, and writers converging on Atlanta this week while I sit in front of my laptop in Brooklyn. And no, I’m not bitter at all…

I did get thinking though about the fact that I just spent the better part of four weeks inhabiting CSTV, the right arm of CBS for all things March basketball. This was CSTV’s second year with the CBS affiliation. Might as well have been the difference between night and day. Last year was such a cyclone it felt like at best we were controlling the chaos. When it was over there was a distinct and pervasive feeling of accomplishment buzzing around the network. It was a feeling, however, accompanied by a comparable sense of relief.

This year was more of a tropical storm. There were some heavy winds, but the foundation of the network remained solid. The preparation was impeccable. The coordination between working parts was consistent and succinct. The final product was nearly flawless. And the side stories were unforgettable.

First, let me introduce myself. I’m the teleprompter guy. The guy whose job it is to quite literally make the script of the show go. While our anchors, Adam Zucker and Greg Amsinger, aren’t as dependent on the prompter as, say Ron Burgundy, it nonetheless makes their lives much easier when their scripts are running in the right place, at the right time. The duty of the teleprompter is very basic, yet integral to the overall operation of the show. Chances are if you receive any recognition on prompter it’s because you suck and are screwing everything up. That said, as long as you’re not prone to slipping into uncontrollable catatonic states, prompting is quite the manageable task.

So that was my principle duty throughout the tournament. Needless to say CSTV has a variety of programming just for hoops. Among the shows are Gametracker Live, a highlights and analysis show; Full Court Press, which brings live press conferences from players and coaches, along with in-studio analysis; Tourney Talk, a call-in show dedicated to shootin’ the breeze about the tournament, and March Madness Highlights.

We also have a rotation of in-studio analysts. Since I spent my waking life hanging around these guys the last month, allow me to now introduce the most notable coaches and personalities who helped turn the wheels of CSTV this past March.

Seth Greenberg: Current coach of Virginia Tech. He’s ushered in a basketball renaissance in Blacksburg, a notorious college football town. With his recruiting and leadership the Hokies have quickly become a force in the ACC, arguably the nation’s most storied basketball conference. He’s also a great TV personality. After Virginia Tech lost to Southern Illinois in the second round of the tournament, he naturally became the Salukis’ biggest advocate, deeming them the “junkyard dogs”. Put simply, an ego armed with a catch phrase makes for excellent television.

Dereck Whittenburg: Current coach of Fordham. He inherited the remnants of a basketball program in 2004 after Bob Hill finished reaping his path of destruction at Rose Hill. In three short years Whittenburg has morphed Fordham hoops from an utter embarrassment into an 18 win team. Just how embarrassing were they? The Rams were 2-26 Hill’s final season. Then the St. Bonaventure program became engulfed in a recruiting scandal and one of its sanctions was to forfeit every conference win, including its two victories over Fordham. That made Fordham the first team to win more conference games (three) than overall games (two). “3-13 in the A-10, 2-26 overall,” I told the coach. “Talk about embarrassment.” I then told him he’d be hearing from me soon enough to write the whole story. Takers? CSTV.com?

Brian Curtis: CSTV’s basketball insider and a regular contributor both in-studio and out in the field. He’s knowledgeable and witty, but sometimes adopts a little too much of a “holier than thou” approach to his business. Given his diminutive stature and propensity for speaking in the third person through a distinctly nasal voice, it’s difficult not to crack a smile when he’s up to his antics. He’s also the host of his own show, aptly named, Taking Issue with Brian Curtis. If CSTV could just allocate a camera crew to follow him around 24-7, I swear Taking Issue would make for great reality television.

Steve Lappas: To sum it up, Lappas is the man. Formerly the head guy at Villanova then UMass, Lapp is a bundle of energy and information with great presentation. He’s one of those few coaches that when you see him doing his thing, you just know he’s cut out for TV. And he’s Greek! So he obviously took all the producers and talent out for a nice Greek meal between shows one night. They dined on the likes of avgolemono (egg-lemon soup), spanakopita (spinach pie), and octapothi (grilled octopus). The unique victuals were warmly received by all. Well, except for a few unwilling stomachs… Yasou Lapp!

Jonathan Coachman: A guest host for CSTV who makes his bread and butter working/wrestling within the ranks of the WWF/WWE. One day when I arrived at the studio and settled down at my station Coachman was in the middle of quite a doozy of a story. Recounting for anyone within earshot, he was detailing the typical revelries of professional wrestlers (like they need articulation). Let’s just say these guys love blizzards. The Coach, meanwhile, assumed the role of the overzealous weatherman, giving us a play by play of one such Noreaster. Classy. In a related story, be sure to check out “My Coke Fest”, part of CSTV’s killer Final Four lineup live from Atlanta!

(I’m serious, check it out: http://www.cstv.com/sports/m-baskbl/stories/032906aar.html)

So as you can see, all around wild and wacky fun times at CSTV this month. And there is much more to come (in addition to My Coke Fest, of course). This year the network is operating exclusively on-site in Atlanta, thus the whole CSTV-shabang has been transplanted to the Georgia Dome and its surroundings. Oh, and in case you were wondering, they won’t be requiring teleprompter services. However I did tell Amsinger if he found himself unable to exist without prompter to merely give me 18 hours notice and I’d hail a Greyhound. And NO, I’m not friggin bitter.

(Grinding teeth…)

Okay, maybe just a little bitter. Hey, it could be worse though. I could be a Kentucky fan. In case you missed it, a caller from Kentucky phoned into our live Tourney Talk show and summed up pretty accurately the state of bitterness:

“I just wanna say, f**k Tubby Smith.”

Duly noted sir, duly noted.

Onto the picks…

Florida over UCLA Gators are the champs, and in order to be defeated a team will have to line up, grab them by the throat, and not let go until there are quadruple zeros on the clock. If UCLA wants any shot of winning this game they should take a look at the 2007 AFC Championship Game or the 2004 NBA Finals. The Colts and Pistons both seized an opportunity to go for the jugular of a dynasty, and held on with the grip of an ironman. That’s the only way to topple the mighty. It’s just not going to happen to Florida until there’s a giant present to force the issue…

Ohio State over Georgetown No one had seen the real Greg Oden until Joey Dorsey checked himself into the Pantheon of Idiotic Statements before the Regional Final between Ohio State and Memphis. Dorsey might be a tree of a man, but Oden is a woodchopper. Dorsey called Oden overrated, and Oden in turn, chopped some wood. Steve Lappas didn’t exactly have to go out on a limb when he referenced the whole “sleeping giant” thing, but the point has been made. Not by Lapp. By Oden.

Take it away ATL!

Mar 6

2 Comments

Bracket Points

I say it every year but it warrants an annual mention: the NCAA Basketball Tournament is the best three weeks in American sports. March Madness is the one sporting event that blurs the boundaries between work and play; between personal and professional. For three weeks straight it invades lives and environments, crosses cultures, while continually dominating the moment.

The common thread? Brackets. For anyone working in an office, going to a school, frequenting a bar, or generally not living in a hole, brackets are waiting to be filled out.

Within a specific populace, the ensuing conglomeration of completed brackets gives way to “the pool”. This pre-tournament ritual helps jump start the madness before the ball even goes up. Since the field of teams is set a full three days before the competition begins, this limbo period allows “the bracketer” ample time to abandon normal activities and research teams with the intention of locating potential sleepers and duds. Sometime within this process comes the moment of conception: a vision of the outcomes of 63 basketball games, unique unto the bracketer.

While a bracket will ultimately not sprout arms and legs, upon completion it without a doubt takes on a life of its own. There is a natural moment of pride associated with the first glance at a just-finished bracket. That feeling of satisfaction then shifts to one of angst, with the realization that the bracketer actually has no freaking clue what’s going to happen. However, confidence returns. The bracketer is by nature cocky. And defense of a bracket in hostile, divisive environments like offices or bars is a must.

You see, some brackets can be made or blown before the tournament even kicks into high gear. Due to the fact that nobody will ever produce a perfect bracket, defending one’s picks is almost as vital as picking the games themselves. Because of this notion the Madness can be divided into two phases: the first weekend of games, and the rest of the tournament.

There are 48 games the first weekend, and the bracketer has a vested interest in every one of them. Which is why over that four day period there are 48 battles to be won or lost, each frequently being decided by a single bounce of the ball. Ideally the bracketer emerges from that first weekend beaten, but not defeated; amazed, but not exhilarated.

While everyone wishes and believes that their picks could theoretically and miraculously all come to fruition, those first four days decisively extinguish that utopia. By this point the hope is that the bracketer’s Elite Eight and Final Four are still relatively intact. This is where the second phase takes over. After the cyclone that blows through the first two rounds, what’s left of one’s bracket becomes cherished. Highlighters, creases, and stains (not to mention buzzer beaters and upsets) have compromised its original crisp and flawless form.

Now there are 16 teams left. The bracketer in you has now become you. You start to see exactly what must happen for your bracket to prevail. Scenarios are playing out in your head. Questions are forming. The angst is returning. Inevitably each game in the Sweet 16 and beyond will become an individual showdown against one of your bracketing competitors. You will adopt schools, fan bases, and basketball traditions you couldn’t have cared less about in February.

After withstanding the whirlwind phase of the first weekend, you discover that from the remnants has emerged an agenda. It’s an agenda of hope, realism, and odds, all simmered together in a stew of March mayhem. And of course directly tied into the fates of the 16 remaining schools.

From this point on the basketball takes over. Teams still playing the second weekend of the tourney fall into two categories, contenders and cinderellas. Contenders are the national powers that found a way to escape the bedlam of the first round. Cinderellas are the little schools that pulled off a shocker or two. Both fall under the general heading of “smokin’ hot”. And any college team that is sizzling in March carries with it an air of invincibility.

Naturally, the level of basketball played is unrivaled. You’ll see guys hit threes from unfathomable distances. You’ll see others sacrifice their bodies, and leap five rows into the stands just to preserve a possession. With bigger venues, NCAA Regionals attract upwards of 25-30,000 spectators, all embodying the passion of their teams.

The Final Four? Only 50,000 people in a football stadium, layered on top of each other and surrounding a 94 foot hardwood court. They’ll be chanting in unison by the ten thousands. And there you’ll be, in front of your TV, crinkled bracket in hand, slippery highlighter in perspired palm, feeling the electricity of the moment, waiting for that one play that will advance that one team you need in order to beat that one friend who’s been pissing you off since fantasy football season ended.

Make no mistake about it, there’s something special about winning your pool; knowing that your bracket was the closest to the actual outcome of this utterly unpredictable, massive sporting sensation. And of course it’s always something special when your forecasting has given you the right to talk loads of smack to your friends and/or associates.

In that light, I’m introducing the first Ballgames Points Bracket Challenge. This will not be the conventional hoops pool. Since my readership is stretched far and wide (and evidently thin), I welcome anyone to submit their picks, and talk all the necessary trash throughout. There will be no blank bracket provided, so fill out your own and post all winners round by round, and attach whatever inflammatory hogwash you see fit throughout the tourney.

Three weeks, 63 do or die basketball games, and a whole lotta s**t talk. That’s what March Madness is all about.

***For more on s**t talk, check out the new CBS/CSTV March Madness promotional initiative. The New York Times summed it up (and legitimized it) best:

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/28/business/media/28adco.html?ex=1173502800&en=1524d91f30a55a0c&ei=5070

Here’s my taped bit on the BC Eagles:

http://cstv.collegesports.com/postup/play.php?vid=7

Dec 4

1 Comment

BCS/Fox Points

*NOTE* Beginning this year the Fox network will have exclusive broadcast rights to three of the four BCS bowl games (Sugar, Fiesta, Orange) in addition to the inaugural BCS Championship Game. Most recently, ABC had deals with the major bowls while Fox owned the rights to just the Cotton Bowl. No more.I’ve never been a fan of Fox’s NFL coverage, as its games are always diluted with too many bells and whistles, in-game promo packages that literally overlap with play by play coverage, and generally poor announcing teams. (With the exception of the crew that includes Daryl “Moose” Johnston in the booth and Tony “the Goose” Siragusa on the sidelines. The great thing is, Goose is the only sideline reporter who is always mic’d up. Combined with the fact that he is, well, “the Goose”, a viewer is guaranteed to have some entertaining and inappropriate inter-jargon between the boys upstairs and the behemoth chiming in live from the end zone. Always fun.)

Other than Moose and the Goose, the best you can hope for watching an NFL game on Fox is that Joe Buck will get peeved enough at a Randy Moss touchdown dance and proclaim it “disgusting!!”. In Fox’s defense, its NFL pregame show is bar none. Terry Bradshaw, Howie Long, and Jimmy Johnson are all unique, amusing, and knowledgeable football personalities. Losing James Brown as the mediator of these wild boys was a tough blow for Fox, but the show must go on, and it has, successfully.

This leads me to Fox’s premier of the BCS Selection Show, which aired live on Sunday night from 7:50 to 8:30. When I tell you this was the most awkward, unintentionally hilarious network studio show in the history of sports, I’m not blowin’ smoke up your tail. Nothing about this show went right. “Murphy’s law” was in da house.

First off, the show was hosted by Chris Rose. Now I consider myself pretty well-schooled in the who’s who of the sports broadcasting business but I’ve honestly never seen (or at least registered) this guy. However if I ran into him on the street and he told me he was in the business I could’ve guessed in one breath which network he was affiliated with. He looks like the less-attractive, slightly older brother of Ryan Seacrest with the voice of a nerdier Adam Corolla. (Yes, I can understand that image may be a little much to comprehend within the context of sports. I apologize.)

Anyways Rose opened the show and introduced his two in-studio analysts, Barry Alvarez (former Wisconsin football coach) and Charles Davis (former Tennessee defensive back). Before I had the chance to realize how uncomfortable these guys were, Rose had spewed off the bulk of his first segment, which included the phrases, “post a bagel in the loss column” and, “all that and a bag of chips”. (I believe these comments were in reference to Boise State’s undefeated season, but I was still in a mini-trance, fearing I had accidentally tuned into the season premier of Bizarro American Idol.)

When I saw video footage of football players everything was aright again, but weird. Rose had tossed his first question to Davis, who, incidentally had a moderate case of laryngitis. His voice started cracking a third of the way through his first comment, and Rose appeared to have been completely oblivious to the whole situation until that moment. Awkward? Sensing Davis’s lack of umm SPEAKING CAPABILITIES, Rose decided to seek the input of Alvarez. The coach looked genuinely uneasy to be in a room with hundreds of lights, not to mention slightly sedated (not sure if the two were connected).

He did his analysis bit and uncomfortably segwayed back to Rose. Rose proceeded to jump right into the announcement of Ohio State’s opponent in the National Championship, Florida. It was as if the producers weren’t divulging even to Rose the time of the super-secret unveiling, and just yelled “Now!” into his ear-piece and the teleprompter started rolling. Smooth? Not quite. In fact, once Fox cut to its first commercial break I was thinking it was one of the most uncomfortable segments I’d ever seen.

By the time they came back from break I was pondering if it would be less uncomfortable watching these guys slam doors with each others tooths tied to the knobs. It was that bad. But it got worse…

It was time to go live to the site of Florida’s selection-soiree. The whole team was assembled, on-camera, behind Fox reporter, Chris Myers, and the Gators head coach, Urban Meyer. Myers asked the coach how it felt to be selected, his take on a possible playoff system blah blah blah. Overall it was a pretty token, dull interview. Until Myers attempted to cite Meyer’s master’s degree from the University of Ohio, which was in, uhh, umm, hold on one sec and lemme Google this guy real quick…

Ah yes, education. It was Urban Meyer’s master’s degree in Education that Chris Myers nearly choked on, with a crew of giddy football players behind him cracking grins to boot.

Back to you in the studio Chris!

Next up? One on one with Ohio State coach, Jim Tressel. He loves the media! And there to interview him, lead play by play guy for the BCS, Thom Brennaman. After a few generic Florida/matchup questions, Brennaman asked Tressel about his feelings on a playoff system. Before giving his diplomatic response there was a instant when Tressel slipped into a Dick Cheney/Jim Mora-esque scowl of seething incredulity. Playoff?? Playoff?!?!?! We’re twelve and freakin’ oh!!!! Priceless.

Equally priceless was Rose’s face back on the screen. That seemed to be enough for me. With palpable awkwardness having invaded every facet of this show, I was ready to tune out, sufficient material for a column in hand (and note). Then I noticed something. As Charles Davis was wholeheartedly attempting to squeak out a comment, I saw someone over his left shoulder. Except it wasn’t someone on one of the many flat screen televisions behind the talent. It was actually someone in the studio.

Yes, there was a heavy-set, balding man seated somewhere off-set, yet in the camera shot. Either that or those characters at the pizzeria put some funky mushrooms on my pie last night. But then again, watching this show was truly a trip.

There were moments when I laughed; others when I thought I was going to cry. I was mortified, exhilarated and in disbelief, all at once. Hell, I was flat out entertained. For some reason though, I have a feeling the powers at Fox Sports didn’t share my sentiments.

From a production and operation standpoint the show was a disaster. But hey, there’s a first time for everything, and Fox was wandering into uncharted territory, its relationship to the BCS just beginning. The network will obviously refine its BCS studio presentation between now and the new year.

Though as a viewer altogether impressed with the pure squirmy-entertainment value of Fox’s first BCS Selection Show, I say if ain’t broke, why fix it? Okay, bad example. I guess what I’m trying to say is sometimes a bar set very low can make those precious ratings go very high.

(But Fox already knows that.)

GEAUX TIGERS!!!!!!

Oct 8

2 Comments

Bye Week with Rudi

When I’m not diligently producing points for my reputable readership I’m shifting in and out of various free lance jobs at College Sports Television (CSTV). Lately I have been working as a researcher for the studio crew. On Saturday CSTV was fortunate enough to obtain the analytical expertise of one of the NFL’s more decorated running backs, Rudi Johnson.

I had no idea he was going to be in-studio, and coincidentally was wearing one of those half-turtleneck, NFL-brand, long-sleeve T-shirts. The only insignia is in the form of a small team logo on the left side of the neck. And those who know my local affiliations understand implicitly that the logo was of a little Patriot. Let’s just say that after watching intently four quarters of the Patriots-Bengals game last Sunday I wasn’t exactly flyin’ outta my “And 1’s” to go and introduce myself.

To add a little perspective Rudi is 5-10, 225 pounds. He wore a sleek cream-colored suit, baggy. To the unknowing those 225 pounds may have seemed diminished, possibly even in question. To a perceptive sports-eye who happened to be wearing some adversarial gear, those were 225 pounds of human steel. So yeah, I had a lot of work to do and didn’t have the opportunity to go say whatup…

After Rudi did a taped-bit he gravitated over to the research area to check in on the day’s games. I looked up and he was over my right shoulder. (At least the logo was out of his line of sight.) I stood up, introduced myself, and told him not to pay attention to my shirt. Which drew his attention directly to my shirt. He chuckled, and reflected briefly on the Pats game. Said the Pats got away with one, and his squad will get another shot come playoff time, with a different result. I noted that the venue may be different, come January. He didn’t waver. I didn’t doubt him.

I asked him about the upcoming schedule. He said they’re going down to Tampa after the bye week. I grinned and joked about how that should be a nice bounce back game. “Somebody’s gotta pay,” he asserted. I once again didn’t doubt him. Probably because he’s one of the nastiest running backs for one of the NFL’s most high-powered offenses. Have I mentioned that? He’s also a down to earth guy. Has that unique combination of ego and personality. He’s brash, and in the same breath modest.

And then he took my seat. As a researcher, ninety-five percent of my work involves staring at a computer screen, tracking football statistics via gamecasts. I had gone to grab a bottle of water, and when I returned Rudi was plopped down at my station, reading up on his squad and his competition. So I stood and waited. I had some, not a lot of work to do. But there really wasn’t any question. I just wasn’t going to be the guy who tells Rudi Johnson to get out of his seat in a Pats shirt. No, I’m not that guy.

When Rudi finished, I retook my seat, and before long he was back flanking me watching the games. We got talking again, this time about his division, the AFC North. Agreed that the Steelers would rebound and the Ravens would level off. I asked him what games he had circled on the schedule, and he directed me towards a Monday night game on December 18th in Indianapolis. Talked about how there will definitely be a lotta offense. I added that this rematch of one of the great games from last season will probably have home-field implications as well. I surely wasn’t enlightening him.

If there is one aspect of the NFL that separates professionals from wannabes, it’s the sheer power with which these guys hit each other all over the field. (In the Bengals-Patriots game last week Reche Caldwell was blindsided so hard that I really thought he was knocked out cold.) In that light I asked Rudi if there was one hit he remembers taking that really flattened him. He laughed and responded that he likes to initiate the hitting. I agreed, assuring him that I have seen plenty of instances in which he pancaked, railroaded or simply ran through opposing players. But there must be that one hit, right…

“John Lynch,” he said. “One time he got under my chin, and hit me good, I needed stitches.” I then asked him if there were any singularly memorable blasts that he’s dealt out. The gist of his response was that those kind of memories were plentiful. He does love a good stiff arm though, and he is part of an elite class of backs who employ it frequently. Most relevant, his ex-teammate, Corey Dillon. He said the two still talk, and was in accord with my claim that Corey was more than happy to accept “the 15” for his excessive celebration after earning a hard-fought, late-touchdown against his old mates.

Looking ahead, Rudi exuded nothing but confidence about the 2006 season. “We expect to win every game we play,” he said. If there is one thing the Bengals have to do better, though, it is to more effectively defend against the run.

“Gotta stop the run,” he said.

“One thing’s for sure, Rudi,” I shot back. “Ya’ll can definitely run the ball.”

He grinned and headed over to the set.

Sports Commentary by Matt Chaprales